An EFA-F 2020 ANNIVERSARY Electronic (Zoom) LECTURE
efafPay It Forward: Remembering Others on the Bottom Side of the Ladder
By: Dr. (Mrs.) Itohan Mercy Idumwonyi
Prologue
First, I salute the chairman, the Board of Trustees, and the Advisers of the Esther Folorunso Ayantayo Foundation (EFA-F) for holding forth these Ten Years. And I humbly thank the conveyer for the invitation to be the guest lecturer for the10th annual EFA lecture. Ten years ago, a woman of inestimable value lived, ate, and walked with us. Today, her light still shines brightly, and it is my prayer that this light and the light of all those who hold forth for EFA-F will not dim.
Introduction
One finger cannot take out lice from one’s hair.”
“No one tree can make a forest.”
“No man is an island.”
“The people around you are your covering.”
“I am because we are, and we are because I am.”
“There is enough for everyone’s need but not enough for everyone’s wants.”
We may be in the technology-driven age, but we cannot overemphasize the role of proverbs in our everyday living. Aphorisms are the lore of the African community. They are uniquely embedded in African tradition and way of life, and it is a communal expectation for Africans to employ and apply them in their daily conversations effectually. They help humans understand that this world is more than ever before a global village. Axioms are the imagery and laconic expression that condenses abstract concepts and ancillary words in metaphoric terms. It embodies philosophical insights and serves as tools for diffusing and expressing cultural values.
It is without a doubt that the maxims above resonate with the datum that one’s happiness, growth, development, and fall in life depend on others with which one lives in the community. Many people’s happiness lies in y/our happiness, and y/our happiness lies in other people’s happiness too. By implication, making people happy enable one’s own happiness. I draw on the above African proverbs to remind us of how much we need each other’s shoulders to lean on both in the bad and in the good times. These proverbs point to the ethics and value of connectedness, relatedness, interrelationship, and relationship. What Mbiti meant here is that humans are relational beings – relational to others. He implies that humans are on the social web and born to be in harmonious interactions and interrelationship. Interaction is the core of the African concept of communality.
You are your brother and sister’s keeper. All you have is never your own in the African context. It emphasizes the Yoruba communal concept of “ojo gbe.” The communality that looks out for the good of the other. It is the communality that prepares dinner and a bedroom for the uninvited and unexpected guest that shows up at midnight. The topic of this year’s discourse resonates significantly with the typical saying: “pay it forward.” When you do all or any of these, you are un/knowingly “paying it forward.” Before we explore the concept of “pay it forward,” let us consider the “forgotten,” and those at the “Bottom side of the ladder” in our communities.
Who are those at the bottom side of the ladder?
“The King will reply, Truly I tell you, whatsoever you do to the least of these sisters and brothers of mine, you do for me.”
(Matthew 25:40)
“Blessed is he that considers the poor: The Lord will deliver him in time of trouble…”
(Psalms 41:1,2)
Those at the bottom side of the ladder are the forgotten members of our communities. I am of the view that one’s love for God should be questioned if one claims to love God that is invisible (not seen) and turn a blind eye on the ‘suffering god’ (i.e. the humans made in the image of God) that we see daily. ‘Seeing’ God entails serving the “least of these” – the “forgotten,” the “underrepresented,” and the “underdogs” in our communities. The idea of serving those who can pay us back immediately (Luke 14:12) is not ethically wrong, but the crux of such service could always be interrogated. The goal here is that we serve all people to the glory of God and the good of humanity. “For I was hungry, and you gave me to eat, I was thirsty, and you gave me to drink … naked, and you clothed me; I was sick, you looked after me (Matt. 25: 35- 36). The Lord is hungry, naked, and forgotten in our midst (Luke 14:12). What is your disposition towards those who cannot return your favor? Are you willing to lower yourself to such a “dirty” and “neglected” person, or in your reflection they are responsible for their misfortunes and, therefore, should be left unattended?
Fascinatingly, human beings are related to others because others are also relational beings in the world. Human existence is fundamentally linked with the reality of other humans for life to be meaningful. The awareness of another person as a human is a representation of one’s own humanness. What this means is that one’s humanness becomes full when one gets in a relationship with other people. Life is made more useful if one recognizes the utility, inevitability, and importance of others as a resource for one’s survival. No one in our community should be forgotten at the bottom of the ladder, and no one should be hungry, no one should be used as an object and dumped. Everyone is invaluable and should be treated as such. All persons are unique with moral worth; they deserve to be treated with respect. Let us position ourselves in ways that we could serve as ladders for others to climb to the peak of their destination in life. We have a duty to others because they are people and also have responsibilities to ourselves. It is evident that one can fix oneself by building another person. This orientation forbids individuality that is centered on me, myself, and I. An orientation that emphasis communality, more than self. It is an orientation that calls for a response to stand with others in different stages of their life’s journey. Mbiti utilize proverbs to theorize that mutual dependence on group and community is essential as the identity of any person and that of the community interweaves for the advancement of the larger society. Mbiti calls on us not to neglect, turn a different eye to the underrepresented and the forgotten, those mostly at the bottom rung of the ladder in our society. It is our responsibility to stand up and support everyone around us. A cohesive simulation is imminent if we do not neglect the down-trodden in the community.
Pay It Forward
“Kindness to the poor is a loan to the Lord, and He will repay the lender.”
(Proverbs 19:17)
Once upon a time, there lived a rich father with many children. He loved all his children equally and did not hesitate to show them how much he cared, and the children loved him too. Baba knew how much the children loved him as they did not hesitate to let him know. Baba said to them continuously: “I know you love me, and you are willing to pay back all I have done and continue to do for you. You must pay me back for all that I have done for you. But the payback is to “pay it forward.” These children did not have the same capacity, intelligence, will power, motivation, talents, endowment. Baba charged them to support each other in ways that the neighbors would not see/know who is more intelligent, more affluent, wiser, more talented, or better than the other. One day baba announced that he was going on a long journey and did not know his return date. He would reward anyone of them that will honor the promise to be supportive of themselves. The children were sad but promised to continue in baba’s precepts to look out each other for each other.
Baba took long at returning, and the children also started feeling the challenges that life was throwing at them. They began to focus more on themselves than on each other. So, the circle of pains, poverty, and suffering started to wear the human face. They started focusing on themselves at the expense of the love they promised baba. Many of their siblings began falling sick, and the increase in death toll began to appear in more familiar narratives. The news was reaching baba in his sojourn land of the happenings amongst his children. And baba keeps writing back to his children to remind them of their promise to look out for one another. He titled all his reminder letters: “pay it forward.”
What is the meaning of “pay it forward?” one of the children asked him. In response, Baba replied with another parable: “when you share, it never runs out, but when you don’t share, it runs out.” Whatever you give today awaits you. It flows to you and beyond you. Many times, for example, you enjoy the fruits of your father’s efforts, good or bad.
Here I draw on the sociological and biblical concepts of “sowing goodness.” Many services may be provided remotely, but human beings could hardly do without neighbors, friends, and family members. Examples abound that supports the idea that humans are social beings and could scarcely live in isolation. It is based on the premise of the above sayings that this lecture explores the theme: “pay it forward.” Pay it forward is a symbolic expression that reminds us of the interdependence and the limitless compensation that accompanies whatever will do, if not now, but in the nearest future, if not to you, but your progenies.
To start with, the book of Ecclesiastes uniquely and practically theorizes human experiences. In chapter 11:1, it gives an admonition to: “cast your bread upon the waters, for you will find it after many days.” One wonders, how so? Is casting one’s bread in water, not a futile exercise? Engaging in such activity is unintelligible to the ordinary mind because water soaks up bread and makes it practically unusable. In my view, Ecclesiastes utilizes bread and water as a metaphor for how human goodness impacts the world. I argue that the verse is a metaphoric call to generosity and symbolic investment, even if a return seems unlikely, and one does not know if the seeds will find a place to grow. It is a clarion call to invest in the “forgotten,” the downtrodden that do not seem to be doing any good or be able to pay you back (Matt.5:44 cf. Luke 14: 13-14). It is a call to “do as much good as you can wherever you go. The principle of sow and reap informs us that somewhere down the road (after a while), one will garner the gains. The good will come back. What this means is that “one will need someone’s generosity someday. Matthew 10:42 and Galatians 6:9 supports Ecclesiastes 11:1 when they say: “and if anyone gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones because he is my disciple, truly I tell you, he will never lose his reward” and “do not be weary in doing good, for at the proper time you will reap a harvest if you do not get tired of doing good (cf. Hebrew 6:10; Deut. 15:10).
The notion of the “pay it forward” does not support the social exchange theory that calls for reciprocation. “Pay it forward” does not present a clear situation that “A” will happen when you do B in a certain way or to some particular people. No! It does not shadow a research laboratory formulary that yields similar results time after time. It invites us to do good not because of the harvest but for ‘goodness’ sake, even when it does not make sense to do so.
This paper and EFA-F stand for a giving that does not ask back. EFA is paying it forward and challenging us to be part of the “pay it forward” project. It is not all relationship that is founded on the “give and take,” and EFA-F is one of such. You give and do not expect to be paid back. We believe that your giving will be watered and it will come back to you after many days. (Eccl. 11:1,6). EFA-F has been very generous.
Auguste Comte describes altruism as a tradition of devotion to the interests of others as an action-guiding principle. It is intentional and a voluntary action that is performed to benefit others as the primary inspiration without expecting a reward. This tradition motivates service to others without expecting to be rewarded.
God created humans to “service” and “manage” the earth. Humans are God’s instrument for supplying the needs of fellow humans. It is in so doing that we draw on the real inner strengths that could become the pillar of support to another person in need (Philippians 4:19). Managing the earth includes managing fellow humans. Many times, we equate service to monetization. In my reflection, it is more than that; it involves telephone calls/text messages to check on another person. It consists of giving a smile, a piece of information, a counsel, a direction, prayers, mere listening to someone’s story, inspiring others, giving of one’s time/talents, etc.
Conclusion
“Service is the rent we pay for the privilege of living on this earth.”
(Shirley Chisholm)
Today, we gather to celebrate and commemorate the life of a woman – Esther Folorunsho Ayantayo – a role model whose presence continues to point us to the above proverbs. Esther cannot be forgotten for her outstanding role and services in touching lives. We attest to it today that her life still speaks and touches lives in meaningful ways. This lecture is a call to join EFA to look out for the downtrodden and the forgotten members of our family and communities.
Esther Folorunsho Ayantayo is asking: “What can you contribute to make the world a better place for somebody in your neighbourhood? She is calling us to use our talents, wealth, ideas, time, etc. to mend the cracks in the walls and remember the “forgotten” in our midst. Therefore, EFA-F implores all to be committed and diligent in doing good. Do not accept any excuses for remembering the forgotten. This deliberate act becomes a part of who you are, and the community will be a better place to live in.
Today, I join Esther Folorunsho Ayantayo Foundation to challenge and motivate you to look out for and pay deliberate and significant attention to the cries of the “forgotten in our community:” the underserved, the underprivileged, the “social underdogs” – widows, widowers, physically challenged, orphans, the aged, and the sick around you. I challenge you to remember that a cup of cold water given to a thirsty person is a lifesaver. A cup of cold water in these days when the world is struggling to unravel the riddles that Covid-19 and other social-economic vices present. It is essential to pay deliberate attention to details – those at the bottom side of the ladder.
Thank you for listening
References
Anonymous, Got Questions? https://www.gotquestions.org/cast-your-bread-upon-the-aters.html
<Accessed August 18, 2020>
Mbiti John S. Introduction to African Religion. (1991). (2nd ed.) Long Grove, Illinois: Waveland
Press.
Mensah, Eyo Offiong, “Proverbs in Nigerian Pidgin” in Journal of Anthropological Research,
Vol. 69, No. 1 (Spring 2013), Pp 87 0 115.
